For years and years I've been alone, me, spinster on the shelf
I'm right fed up with spendin' all me money on meself
I'm all prepared for married life, it's secrets I've been taught
And here's some little odds and ends I've been and gone and bought

One bridal gown, one eiderdown
I've been savin' 'em up since 1894
Got me ribbons and me bows
And there's these and them and those
All packed up in me little bottom drawer

One baby's cot, one flower pot
Where I've planted a ramblin' rose bush for the door
Got a motto for the wall, it says Heaven Help Us All
All packed up in me little bottom drawer

Got a pianner, under the staircase
And I'm teachin' meself to play the maiden's prayer
One toilet set, one bassinet
Now I'm waitin' for love to open up the door
Got a set of Priestley's works and a case of eggs from Turks
All packed up in me little bottom drawer

I've answered every advert in the Matrimonial Times
I've bought me own confetti and a case of weddin' chimes
At night I count me treausres just to see they haven't strayed
I'm very patriotic, everyone is British made

One chiffonier, one keg of beer
And some orange and purple lino for the floor
Got a new pyjama set, made of bright red flannellette
All packed up in me little bottom drawer

One persian rug, one china jug
And some beautiful silverware from Woolworth's stores
With a book by Doctor Pfife, I'm out to be a perfect wife
All packed up in me little bottom drawer

We'll have a bathroo-oom, a beautiful bathroom
And a lovely bath where we can keep the coals
Horse shoe for luck, bell for the muck
And a President Hoover